Babies face. Precious gold-plated reliquaries. Gun things. Kali-infected gold-face things. Gun.

So I shouldn't even bother,

I've x'd all this shit because it would get me in trouble with people that I (unfortunately) love. What a goddam waste of time. C'est la vie. Only this: It is not good. It is a waste.

K.

"That Grant began drinking heavily during the Mexican War, I think, is beyond doubt, the reason being that much of this war must have been extremely dull and depressing. As he did not gamble, disliked sport, was too shy and self-conscious to flirt with the girls and women chance might throw in his way, he began to find a sweet relief in liquor. When all was going right, drink had no mastery over him; but when nothing was doing, or when he felt that he could do nothing, he was unable to resist the temptation to discover in drink that magician who can charm away those dark hours which find the soul on the verge of suicide." (Fuller, J.F.C. General Grant: A Biography for Young Americans. New York: Dodd, Mead, 1932, page 39.)


HOLY SHIT!@

ANYWAYS WAHTS UP MIGGERS???? I AM OKAY THANKS FOR ASKING. I JUST WENT OUTR TO A CLUB AND DAMN THIS FUCKER HOOKED ME UP WIT THa YAY YOU!!!!YA YO!!! YAY YO~~~!! WHOA!!! STILL, THAT STUFF DOESN'T AFFECT ME LIKE WHISKYE DOES. I SLAPPED MY GIRL IN THE GACE TONIGFHT. IT ROCKESD~~!!!! YAY BEER.
SHAKESPEARE IS QUEER!1!! YAY CAPS!!!
CHTRIS, I HATE MYSELF!!! WHY DO I DRINK SO MUCH!!! IT IS SO HORRIBLE, I HAVE SLAPPED MY GIRL AND MY MOTHER JUST YESTERDAY (i WILL GET ANOTHER JOB!!!) WHY OH WHY?? NOTHING GOOD EVER COMES FROM THIS; NOT ALL MY PAPERS, MY LOVE LETTERS, MY HGAPPIEST MOMENTS WITH MY MOST CHERISHED FRIENDS, MY TRIUMPHS HAVE ALL BEEN TAINTED BY MERE BOOZE!!! I AM ALONE THE VILLAIN OF THE EARTH!!!!

"He is a good and brave soldier, tried for years; is sober, very industrious and kind as a child. Yet he has been held up as careless, criminal, a drunkard, tyrant and everything horrible." -William T. Sherman, in a letter to his wife, June 6, 1862. (M.A. DeWolfe. Home Letters of Sherman. New York: Scribers, 1906, page 228).



If this girl is for real, then I hope she chews a bullit soon. Honestly, my Core Drinkers, such as she should not exist to spread base rhetoric. I am addicted to alcohol, yes, but my problem rests in the minds of those that drive me to drink; namely the author of the e-mail. Also, I don't believe it to be actual hate e-mailhomogayness, but it still stands as a counterpoint to my valid point: You sobers are wrecking us with your Dr. Phil ideals and quasi-Mormonistic leanings. There is more to life than boredom, I invite you all to find it.....
......
.......
.......
In my pants.

There exists a certain sense of pleasure in the rising of the sun that I myself have lost, but I love to find it in others. And I hope that I am drunk when I do so experience this because that sun is soooooo fucking bright and round and it blows my mind daily. When I hear those in charge of my life belittle the beauty inherent in our life I shudder to think that others take it, take it and accept it. I find glory in the fact that we are disgusted with our igonrant superiors and that we, inebriated, drunk, fucked, soused, shit-faced, done right, spent, and purposeful motherfuckers are the wave of the future. I'll drink to that.

Also, we have ruled the past:

"When Lincoln was approached with complaints about the appalling number of casualties among Grant's men and Grant's drinking problem, Lincoln responded that a case of whatever Grant was drinking should be sent to all the Union's generals! 'I cannot spare this man,' Lincoln said, 'he fights!'"

He fights, you better believe it. Let's all give a HURRAH! to out 18 th president, Mr. Ulysses S. Grant, a drunkard, a hero, a military wunderkind, a good fucking man who never stopped dripping his blood for those he loved. Goddam it, alcohol may rule my life, but it rules that I chersh, adore, and worship my loved ones and also that I never back down in the face of absolute ignorance. We may not end well, but we will live well....

"After his presidency, Grant found himself in financial difficulties and dying of throat cancer. Grant had lost his military pension when he entered politics, and at that time, there was no pension for a retired President. Determined to provide for his family after his death, Grant accepted the advice of his friend Mark Twain and began to write his memoirs. He approached this last battle as he had all others, with grim and dogged determination. His last days were spent on his porch with pencil and paper in hand, wrapped in blankets and in fearsome pain, slowly scrawling out his life's epic tale. The book was completed just days before his death, and its success took care of his family for the rest of their lives."

We'll all die. Not everyone will live. The caps section makes no sense. I choose to leave it in hoping one day I understand why I wrote it. Probably to make a joke or something.

Love,
Doktor von Whiskey.

Well, i'm not nearly as pissed as I usually am, but I felt compelled to grace this page with my inebriated wit and wisdom.

Well, I'm not too pissed off with naybody besides the usual: really, why do black people go out to eat? Beyond that I'm terribly complacent about my general surroundings.

Please, for the love of Satan, realize that servers hate you. It has nothing to so with yer ethnicity (though it helps) but entirely with yer attitude and inability to tip well. Very few of you are coapable of accomp,ishing a succesful dinner out. Here are some tips:

1) Oh, are you on a first date? How cute! What the fuck do you want to eat? (Tip: Order quixck, i hate you)

2) oh, that didn't taste good but you ate most of ti before telling me? There is a reason we are all in ther corner laughing at you and then I don't say anything and still charge you fro ti. Waht, you are mad? i thought you would be, that's why i spit in yer coca cola before hand. (Tip: Don't bitch. I've already fucked you)

3) Okay so you are foreign, i should learn to "accept and appreciate" yer differences. No. Speak English and speak the fuck up. i don't understand mumble and if you do i will purposely order the wrong thing fro you. Fuck you. And yer country. (Tip: Don't be a cock. i've already fucked you)

4) Kevin, you are racist. Dear fucktwat, work in a restaurant and you will be too. (Tip: you are a fuckcunt)

5) Dear blackperson, what would you like to drink? :;black person stares real hard like they are taking the fucking SAT:: "Can you come back?" after ten minutes (Tip: Black people need to learn how to read before going to a restaurant. Also, they could stand to learn the hidden meaning behind the traditional 15% tip. Also, please stay at home, black people.)

6) Young prom-goers out and not trying to eat that much. Girls in tight dresses always order salads and water. give up the fucking dream, bitches. Eating light one night in yer life will not make a Paris Hilton of you. Get a fucking coke habit. (Tip: Eat somewhere else you soon to be knocked up cunt. Who will still be fat after tonight.)

7) Wedding rehearsal dinners often take place at arestaurants, but the hosts get all pissy about their guests ordering booze. (Tip: If you can't afford it, DO NOT GO TO A GODDAM RESTAURANT!!! Also, if you bitch at the servers because yer yokel kinfolk who are busy fucking yer little sister are ordering too many crown and cokes then you probably shouldn't have "sprung" for the rehearsal dinner. Also, if you take money out of the tip for their drinking then you are just a Luciferian ass fuck)

8) Just don't go to a goddam restaurant. (Tip: this means anyone who has never worked in one. Honestly, you have no idea what kind of fuckied up hell we go through with you cunts. You all disgust me.)

9) White businessmen on a business trip are always welcome. I knwo where the nearest stripclub is you ignorant loud fucks. Also, thanks for all the fat tips. You still disgust me. (Tip: Be loud and obnoxious. Pretend you are back in yer glory days in ninth grade. i love that shit. It's radical. You stupid fat white fucks.)

10)Everyone else, just tip alright and realize we hate you. it's nothing personal, nbut people are fucking horrible and cheap and disgusting when they go out to eat (black people especially) and servers are so tired of it. Why do we continue to serve? Because it's easy to get laid and also easy to find drugs. keep fucking with one of us and you'll have some hung-over smacked out bastard child of Satan (me) fucking you in your eyesocket if you don't behave. Really, Shoneequa, i will do it, and Tyrone will be next.

Love and learn the fucking decimal system you stupid pieces of shit,

Doc.

Well, Hell's Belles i think I jusdt got mesself a pooter for the writtin' thing!!!

That last statement has nothing to do with my asshole.

Really.

Still, so it's Halloween and i'm forced to work. How sad, you say, in your very ass-licking immediate way that never recognizes another's wants and needs. Demmit, my friend, but I NEED my Halloween!!! Shit, my anglicized nigger, Halloween is most definitely my most favoritest holliday and I'm about to unload on yer anglican cotton-picking ass why...
Halloween has fairly ancient origins in old Celtic rites that essentially celebrated the onset of a new season; in this case it was fall, i think. It may also have celebrated Satan's cumming on God's jello pudding pack, but i don't know. It doesn't matter...actually, i used humor to prove THAT IT DOES!!!!! See, we Celts (if yer not one then just die) appreciate the world and feel a need to drink for every occasion. Halloween is just such an occasion and you goddam Satanists have ruined our beautiful birthright of Again-drinking-and-puking-cycle; which is inherent in the Celtic mindset to pursue yer silly notions of otherworldly power. Damn, even we don't believe that shite, we just want to drink. What's the matter with you that yer wanting all the time to spill blood and talk about robert Smith? Even we got bored with that when we were fifteen. There is only one god and it is whiskey and in the name of the whiskey, the beer, and the blood of Jayzus we worship this day. Amen.

Last Halloween I was just getting back from a cold place and I went to see The Genitortures. If you live in Orlando, go see some poeple nail their privates to boards. Also, go see the Genitortures on Halloween. It will proabably be cheap and whean you all discuss how yer brother nailed his scrotum to a blender, you won't sound so weird...as you usually do. You will sound learned. Like Buddhists sound right before they bathe in gasoline. Like you probably should because it will get rid of that weird herpes-like thing on yer face. Forever.

Love in the time of a lack of cholera,
Doc.




Ps. HAPPY HALLOWEEN!!! WHAT'RE YER COSTUMES????? MINE'S A PURPOSELESS SHITRAG!!!!! ANYTHING MORE INTERESTING??????

Why do we persevere in the face of ovious fruitlessness? sssss?
1) That picture of bert to the left makes me think of zomie beach devils....change it. Something about the red hood. RED HOOD RED HOOD RED HOOD!!!!
2) Have you ever wondered when and where and how you will die? This question delights me for the "what if" factor. If I die in such and such a circumstance then I hope such and such happens before I die....the possibilities are endless. IF only we knew!!!! Perhaps that is the great fear; that we will slways live another day whilst temporarily putting off living. I hope when I finally decide to live you are all disgusted. I hope one day to be disgusted by you in turn. Isn't the desire for life not only that we live it but that others also live ti to its fullest? WE do not fear our own deaths so much as the eradication of memory. Memory-Dear Mimir-is our loving touchstone.
I hope to god I am forgotten and left to rot in a mound-grave. 2000 years from now I hope they uproot me and still don't know what to make of me.
3) I wish I spoke French. Make fun of them all you want, they still can charm yer girlfriends pants off of her faster than yer stupid ass and a 24 pack of Rolling Rock longnecks can. Also, you suck in bed. But to read Beckett, Moliere, Montaigne, Rimbaud, Verlaine, Mallarme, et. al. in their native tongue is an entrancing enticement of penile proportions.
4) Numbering this post has been pintless.
5) I might as well make another stupid statement about hings I've done. I saw that Woody Allen film tonight, "Anywhere Else" I think it is called, and was impressed. Not as good as "Deconstructing Harry," but close. Jason Biggs could stand to commit suicide, bur Ricci was wonderful as the perfect girl I'd love to date and then face-beat. What a bitch in this film. We've all known girls like hger portrayal here...why is it wrong to strike women again? I blame the NAACP. They are worthless niggers in search of glorification anyways, might as well throw them a bone. Of white dickmeat. It probasbly tastes better than the endless slurm of practised self-hatred they are forced to drink every day.
99) What a craxy number. Otherwise. Be happy you son't belong to anybody. And if you do, kill them. Please fuck all sense of law and order. If a aman is wrong he deserves to die...no matter who administers justice. Damn, I'm finally drunk. When drunk I get very vigilante. Vigilante should be an adjective to describe my drunk state. God, I wish I was born in Ireland. Away from these already dead fools. Whaer my money counted for naught.
Fucker.
But,
Love,
Doc Whiskey

So,

Tonight I thought about how people react in predetermined manners without any regard to what they really feel or think. I thought this at work where idiocy is the norm. Some fat old Buffet-like fella was singing and there, in the audience, were fat middle-aged "parrotheads" lifting their glasses to his stolen songs about cruisin' on ships and meeting senortias which were so obviously full of baby shit that I could barely stand the yelping. Still, they cheered him on and grafted this now quiet desire of their souls for a few seconds to their inebriated minds. Why? I couldn't fathom it for the life of me.
When I got home I found this penis-sized cockroach in the kitchen and I grabbed a peanut-butter jar and brought it adroitly down upon its body. However, little did I know that I have the executioner's grace, for I merely severed the head off the offending member. A tan jelly oozed from the body and the head lay cenitmeters away. Both wer moving-clawing, grasping chewing, twitching-even though I had effectively severed the main line of reason to the body from the primitive form of brain matter. And it was as if a Joycean epihany struck me at that moment. I understood the fat middle-aged men gleefully and moronically raising their glasses to a more moronic man. There was no longer a connection, though their bodies were intact. They were no more than penisroaches. And I the beheader.
Love,
Doc.

"No one knows how long the astronauts were conscious to consider their fate. It is possible that, as in the case of Challenger, the reinforced crew cabin remained intact some seconds longer than the rest of the vehicle. Then, still hypersonic, it too was pulled apart as it hurtled through the thickening air."


Godbless those who go before us with bravery and fear. God forgive those of us who forfeit such a life.

Love,
Doc

The ramifications of such a name are too beautiful to enumerate.
I do not like frat boys. There are many groups that I don't get along with-for the most part, if you are in a group, I don't gewt along with you-but frat-boys fucking put me on edge. It is their lobotomized cockiness, I think. Fuck, all I want to do is beat it out of them. I am lucky in that I am a nerd with muscles. I have not always been thus. Indeed, I grew me muscles out of strife and inability to react against the bully/frat-boy type. But now I have brutishness. Some of us handle life's little "fuck you's" with aplomb and humor. I prefer to kick the shit ourt of life's little messenger. I have ended a fraternity. I got a fraternity kicked off campus with my fists, goddam it. Sig Ep, eat shit and die in the ditch I made you dig.....
I tried to patalyze that fuckcunt but his neck was too strong and they took me off too soon. Still, if you are a frat-boy, please quit...it only makes you stupid. Also, you live with a bunch of guys who secretly desore sausage for every meal. Drink whiskey instead. It enables you to not only fight the gods, but quasi frat fags as well with no scars to hinder your beautiful evening.
Erin Go Bragh,
Doc.

Abstract: It is postulated there is not a precise static instant in time underlying a dynamical physical process at which the relative position of a body in relative motion or a specific physical magnitude would theoretically be precisely determined. It is concluded it is exactly because of this that time (relative interval as indicated by a clock) and the continuity of a physical process is possible, with there being a necessary trade off of all precisely determined physical values at a time, for their continuity through time. This explanation is also shown to be the correct solution to the motion and infinity paradoxes, excluding the Stadium, originally conceived by the ancient Greek mathematician Zeno of Elea. Quantum Cosmology, Imaginary Time and Chronons are also then discussed, with the latter two appearing to be superseded on a theoretical basis.

What in the fuck does this have to do with getting me laid??????

Love,
Kevin.

P.S.
Sorry to post 2wice in 1ne night.