YO AFUCK YOU. listen. i'm drizzzzzzzunk. i get drunk stay drunk cause i kill it and i rule and yalll suck asssaese. my friend"katye" liks the gay mets for fags that ar ebad at the baseboils. jason gay is like their worst player ever but she loves him but his brains are mush and maybe rita's water ice consistency dot com. URGH. get drunk losrers. arnold loves you. he hates women and maybe you too. commando. predator. terminator 2.

I tried to post last night. Shit didn't work. I'm not drunk, but I will be. Is this shit iphone ready? can you imagine making a super easy iphone app interface so you can sell it for 99 cents a piece and have a ton of drunk idiots get it, gain a wildly huge following like FML, and then $$$$$$. Maybe do that.

yo somtimes it is hard to post on here because there is no fuckin gbutton that says FUCKING POST EHRE. for the extreme drunk ass this sis damn near imporssible. anyway. i have been dirnking red wine. more than a bnottle's worth. i'm drunk,. duh. i watching fucking choppied. they shou.ldn't have that show. its like asking chef EEY HERE ARE THE SHITTIEST INGREDIENTS WE CAN GIVE YOU, MAKE SOMETHING THAT DOESN'T SUCK BALLS. good luck, shiutfuycks. anywa i'm just trying to say i',m druik and you gfguys aren't later. fucktwats.

you shit fced cock masters. i drank alot of stella but aslso i drank makeras smark adn also i' m aeseoms some chicks from ohio wants to suck my dick bu then theye aallll turn sclassy lik ethey weren't from hjere. bitches. also my dick was gonnna get sucked but skluts and i drank wihskye

yo listen up. its kmikey. everyones favorteie awesome dude. i saw the CA PHILAHATMONIC tonight. they were gocool i guess. i wasn't allowed to drink cause i was the DESIDGANTED DRIVER. SHE WAS FUICKING GAY. bvut on the plus i got home in recordd time and also i ate basically nothign today. so i fixed myself a tall pint glass of ELIJAH CRAIG. for you ASSSSHOLES that don't know what that ss is its WHISKWYE on wkehsikwy weekend.  its fucking my UPPPPPPPPPPPPPP. also: tits. thats pretty muchc all i gto. i like tits.

hey dudes and duddtetes and "katye"s. It seveyrone favorite dude of all time ever, MIkeEY. i'M OWNDERFUL. ALSO: i am drunks. i know WHIKSYE EVERYTHING is all the rage, but hey, my place didn't have any whsikey in it but you know what, i make do wiht my surroundings and i had FUCKTONS OF GIN in tehe freezer. i mixxed with tangerine juice and YUMMMMMM. tastes delishcious and then before you know it DRUNKTOWN USA. i hat eyou a;l.

OK, so I live in LA. My apartment building is right next to a public park. "Park" is a  stretch though. There are no swings. No soccer goals. Nothing fun. Basically the only thing that makes this a public park are a handful of benches and a sign that says its a public park- mostly because its named for someone or something I DON'T KNOW OR CARE WHO SO DON'T ASK. Anyway, so since California is super cool to the homeless they go ahead and make themselves at home at said park. Generally, they don't bother me. They pretty much sleep all day and if South Park has taught me anything they pretty much just live off of change without much explaination otherwise. The problem is these fuckers are really annoying when they're actually awake. They just scream at the top of their lungs about god knows what and don't shut up until they're asleep again. Here is the problem: they have no regular sleep pattern and they are loud and wake me up or keep me from sleeping or enjoying my favorite television programming. No one ever calls the cops. I don't because I'm lazy and I think there is a warrent out for my arrest because I didn't reply or report to jury duty (OOPS SORRY COPS!). This brings me to my main point: what if I just killed them? They'd stop being loud and annoying (and alive). They probably don't have ID which means they are SO not legal or anytyhing like that with the legaml mumbo jumbo. So like yeha, someone would find the dead bodies, but i doubt anyone would call the cops cause like, who cares, right? I guess if they did they'd be all like SLAP ON WRIST but then whisper YOU DID US A PUBLIC SERVICE. what's your take? public servant or people killer. CHUNG CHUNG

PS I tried really hard to type this good but it took a really  long time and thats shit got ANNOYYING so it got less god as it went on. whatever dudes. talk shit. bitches. ya'll dong'd

DUDE YOU FUCKS. ITS WHISKEY WWKEEEND. WHY AREN'T YOU MORONS WHSIKEYINBG. WHJISKEY IS A VERB. I AHTE YOU. MY FRIE FD "KATYE" OS O G STRONG. WHATEVER DUDE. I DRINK SHIKWSYE CAUSE ITS GETTTS ME DRUNK ON WHISKEYE WEEKEND. YOU GUS YS ARE SO FUCKING NOT WHISKEY. HALZOZZZZZZZZZZZZ WHY DON'T YOU LUGERS PLAY THATS SANYMORE. URGH. WHIKSEYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY. SEACERREST OUT.

Hey ididots ists mikey! the best dude ever of all time ever. ITS WHISKEY WEEKENEED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!???????????? So first i wanted to let you know wi am drinking..... BOURBON its whisksye but SOUR MASH. but yeah, i'm drunkso. but serious whats the deal with stupid shit. I HATE ITTTT. bourbon i love though. fuck not borubbon. my friend"katye". thats aalll i got i think maybe i'm nott dreall sure. I HATE YOU MROONS.

yo listen up all you mother fuciing bitches that read this site cause i know yours out whtere. Listen up whores. i have been dirnking alot lately. aminyl fro your viewing pleasure./ but you know what? you fucking fuckfacegfagdifkc eaters nmever post shit. and its pissing me off. WHAT THE EHLL IS YOUR DEAL ANYTWAY? don't even tell me you're too good for this site. cause lemme tell you, yiou're NOT. shit heads. so anyway,. FUCKING USE THIS SITE, I DON'T WANT TIT TP SHIT DOWN, ASSFUCKS. so anyway. i was driniking a dn watching dave chappell. that is one funny ass motherfuckoing crayz funny fuckc. he's just funny dude, seriously, watche his shit and drin, it;llm be awsesome. meanwhoiel. i'm graeat and super rad and die i hate you bitches

PS

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